Indian Weddings: Cultural Canopies?
In 2012, a Syrian Christian, Missy Mathews’ (Missy) wedding in Kerala, India, was not the typical Christian wedding. Missy was brought up in Australia and Bollywood was an essential part of her childhood. For her wedding, Missy had many Punjabi rituals, including a mehendi and sangeet. Even
the food served was North Indian, with items like bhelpuri and chum chum in the menu. Missy also sought permission from the priest solemnizing her wedding to have mehendi on her hands. The only thing Missy couldn’t manage was convincing the men in her Malayali family to wear pink turbans. In Christian Weddings, dancing and alcohol are not uncommon at the reception but held as a big party after the church wedding. However, in the past, the songs one would hear at a Christian wedding reception wouldn’t include something like Mujhse Shaadi Karoge!”1 Indian weddings went through a cultural metamorphosis with oriental and occidental influences. What made a Keralite Christian to take to the ostentation of a Punjabi wedding? Do consumers always adapt culture related experiences? How does consumers’ acculturation and enculturation redefine related businesses’ prospects?
Indian Marriages – The ‘Cultural’ Metamorphosis
According to Sanatana Dharma way of life ‘marriage’ stands first amongst the ten very important sanskaras of Hindu life which have to be sanctified through religious observance.2 In Sanskrit the word ‘Vivaha’ (marriage) is a composition of two words ‘Vaha’ and ‘Vi.’ Wherein, ‘Vaha’ means ‘to flow’ and “Vi’ means ‘harmoniously together.’ Therefore, the word ‘Vivaha’ means ‘to flow together harmoniously.’ The oath and bond of dedication that the bride and groom take to each other is mutually agreed that “carries” them along for the remainder of their life journey.3 In India, there is no greater event in a family than a wedding. Indian weddings are more than just a festive occasion, especially when it’s planned and arranged in a traditional manner.4 A wedding in India is more a wedding between two families than between two persons.5
The onset of the 21st century brought in several cultural shifts in Indian weddings which were earlier culturally and religiously embedded. Due to several factors such as globalization, urbanization, technology, education, impact of Western culture, etc., continual changes are taking place in ideals, forms and values of marriage.6 For instance, a traditional Hindu wedding is a religious sacrament with the performance of certain rituals like Kanya Dana, Agni Parinayana, Saptapadi, etc., (Annexures I (a) & I (b)). What was once a family affair, under the new Indian consuming class, marriages pan India (South, Central, East and West) are now being served with different flavors. For instance, due to Punjabi/Bollywood influence the ceremonies like mehendi and sangeet have become a requisite part of any wedding. Earlier the wedding venue would be the bride’s home and parents/elders used to ensure an enjoyable event, while in present times weddings are managed by sophisticated wedding planners and the venue witnessed a change from bride’s home to destination weddings.
Earlier life-partner selection was the prerogative of the parents or the guardians, (they used to visit a matchmaker or post a classified advertisement (Exhibit I)). Now, individual choices are the order of the day. The surge in matrimonial websites stands as a testimony to this. While divorce and second marriage were a taboo earlier, today there are exclusive matrimonial sites for divorcees (SecondShaadi.com). Arya Samaj Movement has promoted inter-caste marriages.7 Inter-caste marriages, hitherto considered unthinkable, are now not only permitted but also encouraged.8 On the other hand, due to registered marriages and live in relationships, rites and rituals have diminished to a considerable extent.9
Indian Weddings: ‘Cultural’ Influencers
With many cultural influences over a period of time the Indian weddings are witnessing immense changes. A Malayali wedding is a case in point. The mehendi ceremony (Exhibit II) which takes place just before the wedding was not a familiar one in Kerala until recently.10 Now Malayalis have taken the festivities to the next level by adding not only choreographed dance sequences but also skits based on themes as part of the celebration.11 “Initially, the relatives were a little skeptical about having a dance function before the marriage,”12 observed Missy and says, “But once the function started everyone enjoyed every bit of it. It proved to be a great ice-breaker and allowed my fiancé, who didn’t know her family very well, to meet his newly-acquired relatives in a relaxed setting. We understand people better when we sing and dance together.”13
In India, marriage has always been an ostentatious affair – the mood is upbeat where each one tries to outshine the other with inputs borrowed invariably from reel weddings (Exhibit III). The grandeur and opulence seen on celluloid is also replicated to a large extent by the elite and the nouveau rich sections as well.14
Several Indian communities from all the 29 States and 7 UTs have adopted certain rituals like sangeet and mehendi which are slowly becoming an ‘integral’ feature of Indian weddings. The DDLJ (Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge) and HAHK (Hum Aapke Hain Koun?) along with Monsoon Wedding and Bend it like Beckham
`celebrations’ now seem to have taken over the Indian weddings.15
Sharing his view on the Bollywood influence on weddings in India, Mumbai-based playwright Bharat Dabolkar says, “Even a Maharashtrian or a Kerala wedding now has five functions, with choreographed dances included. Everybody wants a five-day affair, Bollywood style.”16
In India, apart from fashion the only other thing that Bollywood has often influenced is weddings. Sentimental, dramatic and larger than life is the DNA shared equally by both Bollywood and Indian marriages. Bollywood had held aloft its flag across the globe that, young Indians are now familiar with terms like mehendi, sangeet, karva chauth, roka, mangni and the works associated with them.17
| Exhibit III: Bollywood Movies That Redefined Indian Weddings | ||
| Name of the Movie | Year of Release | Elements of Impact |
| Waqt | 1965 | For starters it brings back the nostalgia of a bygone era and though it was definitely not set in the backdrop of a wedding, this movie gave us the eternal ‘Aye meri zohra zabin’, the song which inevitably makes it to every Sangeet night. The shiest of the elderly shake a leg in Sangeet nights with just the right amount of coaxing to go with the beats of this timeless musical number. |
| Hum Aapke Hain Kaun? | 1994 | This Madhuri Dixit-Salman Khan starrer was nothing less than a wedding epic. Madhuri’s backless choli, green lehenga and Salman’s three piece wedding suit became the recurrent theme of every to-be wed’s wardrobe. It was rumoured during the movie’s never ending run that more girls watched it with their tailors than boyfriends.
Hum Aapke Hain Koun?, celebrated the spirit of a Indian wedding in all its glory. From family antakshari to the flirtatious joote do paise lo, this Suraj Barjatya flick set trends in almost every aspect of weddings. It was after all, a heady cocktail of ritual and banter. Now isn’t it that exactly what Indian weddings are all about? |
| Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge (DDLJ) | 1995 | Clichéd, as it may sound, this list can never be complete without the mention of this SRK-Kajol blockbuster. Set in the backdrop of a very rustic and equally romantic ‘sarson ka khet’ set-up, DDLJ explored the nuances of a typical NRI-Punjabi wedding. Even now, more than a decade later, couples still go all dreamy-eyed at the thought of being shot in those green yellow mustard fields. |
| Jodha Akbar | 2008 | Why mention Jodha Akbar which was more of a period film, one may wonder? That is until you ask a jeweller what kind of demand this film sparked for ‘Kundan’ neckpieces and ‘jadau jewellery”. And not just for women, Hrithik inspired classy yet minimal jewellery for men had its takers too.
Imitating a breath-taking Aishwarya Rai, who depicted the Rajputana valor in her gorgeous Red and Green lehenga, many brides walked down the aisle and said ‘I do’ in exact same replicas, that year. |
| Band Baaja Baaraat | 2010 | Enter the wedding planner Shruti Kakkar from Band Baaja Baaraat. Let us fast forward to the era where weddings became bigger than ever, almost like a corporate affair– theme weddings, destination weddings, globe-trotting and discerning Indians. |
| Source: “5 Movies that changed the Indian Wedding Scenario”, https://in.lifestyle.yahoo.com/5-movies-changed-indian-wedding-scenario-022537802.html | ||
Nearly, 30,000 couples get married in India every day!18 Some of them get married to foreigners (Exhibit IV). Ragin Patel, a professional who is married to a foreigner (Jane) who lives in London says, “My wife would not think twice to take up a project overseas. But had I been married to an Indian girl, she would be expected to cook and I would be under pressure to earn money. Morality issues being low in the west is a myth.”19 While Indian festivities, rituals and customs had been the pulling factor for foreigners to say ‘I do’ here, the prosperity of middleclass and their yearning for ‘celebrations with a difference’ making them to
spend more on weddings creating an industry estimated to be worth $40 billion (around ₹2.5 lakh crore). This surge in spends on wedding vows had also created an ecosystem of an ensemble of allied services like beauty, fitness and photography.20
According to Alex Kuruvilla, President of Condé NastIndia21, the average Indian spends a staggering one- fifth of the wealth accumulated in his lifetime on a son or daughter’s wedding, second only to the investment made in the family home.22 Outlining the rise in weddings and its allied business in India, Tata Institute of Social Sciences’ Associate Professor and Centre for Human Ecology, Chairperson, Sujata Sriram said: “Today, marriage is increasingly driven by a desire for companionship and emotional support. Grooming is also catching on in India, as men are becoming increasingly metrosexual. There is a higher willingness to spend on looking good and this is evident with the rise of male aesthetics in India which can also be seen across film, literature and entertainment,”23 as shown in aesthetics (Exhibit V).
| Exhibit V: Item-wise Expenses in Indian weddings | ||
| Sl. No. | Item | Amount (in ₹) |
| 1 | Bridal designer saree/lehenga cost | 10,000 – 50,000 |
| 2 | Designer shervani cost | 15,000 – 40,000 |
| 3 | Wedding invite cost | 500 – 1500 per card |
| 4 | Bridal make up cost | 5000 – 50,000 |
| 5 | Bridal Mehendi cost | 1000 – 5000 |
| Source: Sahiba Sachdev, “The Flourishing Indian Wedding Industry”, http://www.indianretailer.com/article/whats-hot/trends/The-Flourishing-Indian-Wedding- Industry.a247/ | ||
Sharing the same outlook regarding the paradigm shift in Indian weddings from conventional to pomp and show, Gunjan Bansal, CEO, L’Amore Weddings (one of the earliest wedding planners in India) says, “While weddings were a simpler affair about two decades back, economic liberalization and the rise of the middle class have prompted a change in attitudes. In India, people are spending a lot of money on weddings. Gradually, the trend of hiring a planner is growing.”24
Explaining the mix-and-match wedding that is the new norm, Sociologist, Madhuri Raijada (Raijada) said, “People no longer live in their hometowns, they work in offices where they share their space with people from multiple cultures. So they adapt what they like.”25 While appreciating the fun aspect of these weddings, Raijada also voices concern. “Imitating food and functions is just superficial. People have these functions because it’s fun, but there’s also consumerism involved,”26 argued Raijada and said, “These extravagant ceremonies borrowed from Bollywood often make a statement about personal wealth and social status.”27
Indian Weddings: ‘Culturally’ Professionalized?
Lakshmi Rammohan, Founder ‘Dreamweaver Weddings’ (a wedding planning agency) had been planning and executing weddings for middle-and upper middle-class families, with a budget range from ₹7 lakh to
₹1crore.28 Her remuneration is ₹20,000 (non-refundable) for initial estimates, and the rest is less than 15% of the wedding budget. “It is heartening that even people who spend ₹7 lakh on a wedding want a planner,”29 she opines and says, “Hiring professional planners, then, is no longer the preserve of industrialists and stock market hotshots.”30 Vandana Mohan, Founder of Delhi-based ‘The Wedding Design Company’ opines that getting married out of the home towns (to destination weddings) had become a trend and took the fancy of not only metro-savvy families but also the illustrious and nouveau riche families in Tier-II and Tier-III cities such as Mysore in Karnataka to Moradabad in Uttar Pradesh.31
Abhishek Jain, Founder of MyShaadi.in, says, “One thing that’s different now is that the couple is involved in the decision-making, which was not happening earlier. They have to decide who is the right jeweller, the right invitation card designer and even things like where to go for the honeymoon. This information they look for online – that’s where we get in and advise them on everything.”32
Zara Chowdary, Producer at ‘The Wedding Filmer’ (a Mumbai-based company that specializes in filming weddings) with a sizeable experience in wedding photography observed cultural ambience across India during the weddings on close quarters. She opined that, “over the years, we have observed that with social media and rising number of globetrotters, orthodox traditions are slowly evolving, if not necessarily changing. These changes can be sensed throughout a wedding, whether it is the attire or the venue décor.”33
The Taj Wedding Barometer Survey findings states that there is a sizeable change in the number of love marriages, but on a slow pace (the increase is over 25 years). Though, finding a marriage partner is still the parent’s domain, they are competent enough to make the wedding on their own.34 The survey, conducted by IPSOS, in which 1,000 young people aged 18-35 in 10 major cities (Mumbai, New Delhi, Bangalore, Kanpur, Ahmedabad, Hyderabad, Nagpur, Ludhiana, Chennai and Surat) were interviewed, which throws up some interesting findings (Exhibit VI) which makes one re-think the preconceived notions of the young modern Indian.35
| Exhibit VI: The Taj Wedding Barometer Survey (2013) | |
| In Family We Trust | • Indians are still conservative in their attitude towards finding the right match with 3/4th still keen on arranged marriages. Of these, 82% are women who prefer parents and family deciding their future mate. At 68%, men are turning even more independent with every passing generation
• Arranged marriages rule in the North with 82% respondents preferring an arranged marriage compared to the national average of 74% • Irrespective of gender, social standing or region, close to three quarter respondents trust their extended family to manage the entire wedding |
| Be Mine | • Overall, both men and women prefer proposals in private
• One-third Indians from the West prefer a straight-forward proposal, without shenanigans or brouhaha • 21% respondents in the South, both male and female believe that women should initiate the proposal, as opposed to the national average of 10% who feel men should be the first initiators • Nearly, twice as many men believe that women should take the marriage proposal initiative. 13% male vis-à-vis 8% female |
| Lord & Lady of the Rings | • ‘Ring ceremony’ is the most preferred pre-wedding function favored by respondents (97%)
• ‘Sangeet’ ceremony is its closest competitor at 81% followed by religious functions at 71% |
| The Overseas Effect | • Indians have adopted styles that were predominately followed abroad such as Bachelor and Cocktail parties
• Bachelors party preferred venue: Resort away from home (34%) followed by 5/7 Star hotels (30%) and farmhouses (13%) • Cocktail party preferred venue: 5/7 Star hotels (40%) followed by a resort away from home (33%) and a farmhouse |
| The Look | • Grooming has become an integral part of any bride and grooms pre-nuptial preparation, but is significantly more important to women than men at 47%
• At 46%, ‘facial’ is the most important service in a grooming package followed by spa and beauty treatments at 23%. Furthermore, it is significantly more important to people in the South (50%) and North (46%) than people in the West (31%) • Facial (54%), make-up (21%), mehendi (21%) and hair styling (20%) are more popular with women than men • Respondents in the South are more likely to have their hair styled while people in North prefer spa and beauty treatments. Respondents living in the West are more likely to opt for bleaching services |
| Dress Maketh
The Man/Woman |
• At 73%, 65% and 48%, wedding attire, wedding day and cuisine respectively are three most important aspects of a wedding
• 77% females consider their wedding attire as the most important aspect of a wedding as compared to 69% men |
| Gastronomical delights | • South Indian and Chinese are the most preferred cuisines at weddings standing at 56%, followed by North Indian
• Majority would serve 5-15 dishes to guests at their wedding |
| Come One, Come All | • 500 is the magic number. The ideal wedding guest list is between 251-500 people
• Males and respondents from the South prefer larger weddings with more than 1,000 guests compared to women and respondents from the rest of India • Females, regular people and respondents from the North and West prefer a small wedding with a guest list comprising of 101-250 people |
| Romance is Not Dead | • 80% respondents prefer honeymoons at conventional romantic destinations and within a week of their wedding
• Goa remains the classic honeymoon destination closely followed by Ooty and Srinagar • Men go European while women vote for the American dream: 46% men would prefer Europe as a destination for a honeymoon abroad, whereas 36% women would prefer the US • All-in-one for women; 25 per cent women prefer buying a combined wedding ceremony and honeymoon package from a 5/7 star hotel |
| Source: “The ‘TAJ’ Wedding Barometer”, http://www.theindianbeauty.com/2013/03/the-taj-wedding-barometer.html, March 3rd 2013 | |
Experts opine that there is a sizeable influence of technology on the entire value chain of Indian weddings. Hitting the online websites for match making, wedding planners, caterers, decorators, confectioners, jewelers, bridal wear, etc., witnessed a surge. Parents visiting local matchmakers (who used to carry the resumes of prospective brides and grooms door to door) to seek a match for their sons and daughters, was in vogue earlier. Today, due to several factors like globalization, urbanization, families are shifting to cities leaving behind the village-based kinship networks, as a result, highly educated men and women are finding difficult to get matches of their stature. Under these limitations, families have sought larger networks, mostly through matchmaking sites.36 About one out of every eight Internet users in India is signed up on one of the country’s so-called “matrimonial websites.”37Shaadi.com is one of India’s three most popular marriage sites, along with Jeevansathi.com and BharatMatrimony.com.38 There are portals which offer match making services exclusively for VIPs (Exhibit VII (a)) and elite strata of the society (Exhibit VII (b)). Joining the list, Second Shaadi, offers a repository of matches for people who are divorced, or widowers for a second marriage.39
Chhabra 555, a prominent women wear store claims that a substantial amount of its bridal sales come from online customers. Heena Malhotra the designer at the company says, “Brides don’t mind buying their wedding ensemble online. Traditionally, people wanted to look and feel the fabric and texture before buying an
| Exhibit VII (b): Elite Matrimony – Online Matchmaking Website for Elite Classes |
| Source: Isabel, “Bizarre Indian ads”, http://www.indiaoutsidemywindow.com/2012/11/bizarre-indian-ads.html, November 16th 2012 |
expensive saree or lehenga (long skirt). But now they are more open to online shopping.”40 Several innovations are spanning wedding planners’ landscape. They now feature real weddings to connect would-be couples with sellers (Bridal Wear, Wedding Photography, Floral Decorators, and Confectionary Vendors, etc.) Pushing this envelope are interactive websites like Wedmegood.com and ShadiSaga.com, which enables the newly married couples post their marriage photographs in a story format. The advantage of this interactive feature is that the posts are tagged with various vendors whose services were used for those respective weddings – photographers, caterers, make-up artists, decorators, venue choreographers, etc. As the detailed portfolios are featured on the websites, people who are visiting these websites can get the entire information of these vendors like charges, services and past work.41
In order to streamline the processes, San Francisco-based software development company Veristrat launched Shaadi-e-Khas, a wedding management software exclusively for India, in April 2011. Giving a shot in the arm for wedding planners and retail customers, this software facilitates RSVPs, guests’ travel dates, accounts, hotel reservations, providing directions to the venue, and uploading wedding pictures and videos on a single platform.42 “Unlike an Excel sheet, Shaadi-e-Khas makes your work about 80% more efficient by sending you automated reminders for every task,”43 says CEO Bharat Kanodia. Coupled to this, the online software comes with an embedded list of 800 pre-screened vendors, including florists, mehendi artists, and videographers.
Consumers’ Cultural Musings
With 1 billion population, more than 1600 languages and 9 religions, India is unity in diversity. Do modern marriage ceremonies reflect this? For Indian consumers’ from across 29 States and 7 Union Territories, wedding practices over the decades became more inclusive. Given the importance of a wedding ceremony in an Indian family and expected adherence to cultural norms, industry veterans and seasoned marketers wonder as to why the impact of culture is deep-rooted in Indian Weddings and if marketing can influence a set of cultural practices.
Assignment Questions
- What do you understand by cultural metamorphosis? How would you distinguish the paradigm shift in the cultural ethos of Indian weddings? From the case facts, can you establish the invisible hand of culture in the light of three levels of subculture (Supranational, National and Group)?
- How is culture shared and learned? What are the three distinct forms of cultural learning? How language and symbols, rituals, cultural customs and beliefs are shared with respect to weddings in India? How do you think the influential factors (Bollywood and Mass media) highlighted in the case study impact the cultural learnings?
- According to you what are the changes you have witnessed across the value chain of Indian weddings with respect to Indian core values? What are the contributing factors to this shift? What is the implication of this on the consumer behavior?
Mandatory Reading
- Leon G. Schiffman, et al., “Influence of Culture on Consumer Behavior”, Consumer Behavior, 10thEdition – Pearson Publications, 2010 – To understand the cultural shifts and its impact on consumer behavior in the light of Indian weddings
| Annexure I (a): Traditional Ceremonies of a Hindu Wedding | |
| Ceremonies | Description |
| Vara Satkaarah | Welcoming of the bridegroom’s party by the bride’s family |
| Achamana and
Angasparsha |
Achaman (sipping a small amount of water) is purificatory and conducive to peaceful attitude of mind. Angasparsha (touching one’s limbs with one’s right hand middle two fingers with a little water) is intended to pray for physical strength and alertness |
| Madhuparka ceremony | Madhuparka is drink (honey, curd and ghee or clarified butter) offered to the bridegroom by the bride’s parents to symbolize sweetness and joy |
| Kanya Daan: | This is probably the most important and most symbolic part of a wedding ceremony. ‘Kanya’ means daughter and ‘Daan’ means giving away, hence in this part of the wedding ceremony the bride’s parents give her away by entrusting her to the bridegroom |
| Vivah-homa | All solemn rites and ceremonies commence with the performance of Homa (sacred fire ceremony or Havan yajna) among the followers of Vedic religion. The idea is to begin all auspicious undertakings in an atmosphere of purity and spirituality. This atmosphere is created by the burning of fragrant herbs and ghee and by the recitation of suitable Mantras |
| Pani-Grahanam | This is the acceptance of the bride by the bridegroom as his wife. The bridegroom raises the bride’s hand with his left hand, clasps it and promises to protect her and their progeny, follow in the path of virtue with her and overcome all obstacles so that they may live a life of happiness and attain their spiritual goals together |
| Pratigna-karanam | At this stage the couple walk around the fire and take solemn vows of loyalty, steadfast love and life-long fidelity to each other |
| Shilarohanam | ‘Shila’ means stone. ‘Arohan’ means ascending or stepping upon. The mother of the bride assists her to step onto a stone and counsels her to prepare herself for a new life. A married couple are likely to encounter ups and downs, joys and sorrows, sickness and health. In spite of difficulties facing them they are enjoined to remain steadfast and true to each other |
| Laja Homa | During this stage of the ceremony, oblations are offered to the sacred fire. The brother of the bride puts fried rice into her hands, half of which slips into the bridegroom’s hands under hers, which then slips into the fire. This is done three times over whilst the bride prays to Yama, the God of death, for the long life, happiness and prosperity of her new husband |
| Agni-Parikrama/Mangal Fera/Pradakshina | This stage is one of the most auspicious parts of the ceremony and consists of the couple walking around the fire clockwise four times. It is believed that the moon protects the bride for the first seven years of her life followed by the sun in the next seven years of her life after which agni (fire) acts as her custodian. Hence appropriate respect is given to agni by carrying out this custom of walking around the fire |
| Saptapadi | The ends of the bridegroom’s scarf and upper garment of the bride are tied together by the priest, signifying the marriage knot. Uncooked grains of rice are placed in a line at equal distance at seven places. The bride and the groom take seven steps together as the priest recites mantras – each step signifies a different aspect of marriage that they hope to uphold together with the final goal of being true companions and remaining life-long partners through wedlock |
| Saubhagya-chinha | The bridegroom blesses his bride by putting sindhur (vermillion powder) at the parting of her hair on her forehead and by giving her a mangalsutra (sacred necklace) |
| Abhishekh, Surya Darshan & Dhruva Dhyaanam Darshanam va | The priest sprinkles water on the bride and groom after which they both meditate on the sun to give them power to lead a creative, useful and meaningful life. Finally they both meditate on the pole star and the Arundhati star (Dhruva Dhyaanam Darshanam va). The Pole Star is stationary and fixed in its position; likewise the couple is expected to be steadfast and firm in fulfilling their vows and responsibilities. |
| Anna Prashanam | In the last symbolic rite the couple makes offerings of food into the sacred fire with chanting of Vedic Havan Mantras. Having done this, the couple feed a morsel of food to each other – symbolic of mutual love and affection |
| Aashirvaadah | This is the final stage where there is benediction by the elders. Firstly the priest blesses the newlywed couple, after which other elders do the same |
|
Source: Shivani Mehta, “The Hindu Marriage – Vivaha Sanskara”, http://www.nhsf.org.uk/2006/06/the-hindu-marriage-a-vivaha-sanskara/, December 15th 2014 |
|
| Annexure I (b): Eight Types of Weddings Described in Manusmriti | |
| Brahmana | Father or guardian gave away his daughter “decked with costly garments and jewels” to a carefully chosen bridegroom well-versed in the Vedas and endowed with noble qualities. The bride’s father also honored the bridegroom by offering him a traditional drink made of honey |
| Daiva | The daughter, “duly decked with ornaments,” was given in gratitude to a priest for performing some important worship ritual |
| Arsha | The bride’s father received a gift of a milk cow and a breeding bull from the bridegroom. This gift, permitted by the sacred law books, was a token of respect-not a dowry. In ancient times dairy cattle were the main wealth of the Hindus, hence such a gift |
| Prajapatya | The bride’s father gave his daughter away to the bridegroom with this traditional blessing: “May both of you perform your duties together.” The bridegroom was also honored by being given a traditional honeyed drink |
| Gandharva | The bridegroom and bride married secretly without the knowledge of their parents or guardians |
| Asura | The bridegroom voluntarily gave as much wealth as he could afford to the bride and her relatives, and then received the bride as his wife. Such gifts were not in accordance with the injunctions of the sacred law. The lawgiver Manu did not approve of this because it was like buying the bride by paying money |
| Rakshasa | The girl was forcibly taken away from her family and then persuaded to marry |
| Paishacha | A person married a girl whom he had seduced while she was asleep, intoxicated or insane |
| Source: Dmitr Koval Swarozhich, “Sanatana Dharma —A Way of Life”, http://eng.kangtega.name/index.php/sanatana-dharma/61-6-sanatana-dharma-way- of-life-hindu-marriages, 2010-2015 | |
